Finding Some Confidence (BEDA Day 15)

Things I did today:

-Dragged myself out of bed late and started the day running behind

+Laughed a LOT with my colleagues and a couple of students that are on campus early today

+Brainstormed some training sessions for students that I'm excited to present next week

+Managed a tricky situation at work and felt somewhat confident about it?

+Had enough energy after work to clear the sink of dishes and cook dinner

+Practiced drawing dogs (something I've always struggled with) while watching Jersey Shore with Brett, Craig, and Meg

Today was also my 1 year anniversary at my job, and I've been really feeling like I've been hitting my stride the last couple of days. I'm usually riddled with impostor syndrome and question all of my decisions, but for some reason I actually feel like I know what I'm doing?????? It's crazy what a year on the job will bring you. I still have so much to learn and I have a few major facets of my job that are brand new to me this year, but I'm actually feeling good in my role for a change. It's a nice feeling.

Admitting that I've been feeling somewhat okay (or dare I say... GOOD) the last couple days actually scares me. For some reason admitting that to myself makes me so nervous that I'm going to fall back into a depressive state. and an even deeper one at that (nothing like mental illness to make you think irrationally like that, amirite). I came across this comic from The Sad Ghost Club today and it really spoke to me. I felt really good today and was able to accomplish a lot of positive things, but "Doing My Best" might look different tomorrow, and I have to learn to be okay with that.

{source}